During the divorce process I offered equitable visitation. He said he didn’t want that much time. During a hearing the judge asked him why he didn’t want more time with his son. He looked at the judge and said, “Because, when my son is with me, she can do whatever she wants. Why should she have so much free time?” Everyone in the court was shocked. They couldn’t believe what they’d heard. The judge said, “Are you serious?” He said, “Yes!” The judge paused for a minute then said, “Then you will pay the highest child support percentage the law allows me to impose.”
He got his way, but he was still angry. One day he asked me to drop off his mail that had come to the apartment after we had divorced. Reluctantly, I agreed. When I pulled up to the restaurant, I was on my cell phone, so I rolled down the window to hand him the mail. He was angry. He said, “Who are you on the phone with?” I said, “None of your business! Here’s your mail.” He stared at me, then reached into the car and snatched the phone out of my hand. I jumped out of the car to try and get it back, but I couldn’t. He threw it on the ground then kicked the pieces in the gutter water drain. He said, “Whoever he was won’t hear from you today!”
My children were in the back seat, so I jumped in my car and drove off. Out of fear that I would call the police on him, he went to the police station and filed a warrant application. He told them that I trespassed and stalked him by coming to the restaurant, and he wanted me arrested immediately. The police warned him that he could face charges of his own if he filed a fraudulent application. He didn’t care.
One day at work the police arrived. My supervisor asked if she could help them. She was a white lady from the area who had been through divorce herself. She knew several members of the police department and a few ladies at the court house. She was always so kind to me, and she protected me that day. She explained to them that I was the one who had been attacked and harassed, and I didn’t file charges because I just wanted to move on. They believed us, however, I would still have to appear in court to address the application. My supervisor went with me. Ultimately, the judge dismissed the entire thing and said we needed to figure things out since we had to co-parent.
He was angry. Things didn’t go how he’d planned. So he would later call the Department of Family and Children Services and tell them that I beat my children every day and that they belonged in foster care. They asked him, if this were true, why didn’t he file for a protective order and custody modification with the court. He said, because he didn’t have time to care for the children full time. Even still, I was required to take my children in for an examination, where they concluded the report to be fraudulent. They encouraged me to press charges against him for false reporting. But I was tired. I just wanted to get as far away from him as possible.
S
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