I remember meeting with my cousin Parika before leaving California. I told her I feared not being able to build a career in a new state. She said, “Don’t worry cousin, you speak very well and you are smart. You’ll do just fine.” I pulled from those words after I filed for divorce. I knew no one other than his family; and they were no longer my family. I remember telling myself there was no time for crying. My children needed me. So, I got to work.
My attorney immediately filed a motion asking the court to require him to pay the rent and child support until the conclusion of the matter. The judge issued a temporary order in my favor when he learned the restaurant we owned, only paid him a salary. I found a part time job in the evenings with the help of a baby sitter. I got my children off to school in the mornings and picked them up after school. I was moving on, while his anger intensified.
I would eventually find a better paying job with 9-5 hours, and put my children in after school care. My children and I had a new normal. Until, one day I came home for lunch and I’d been robbed. My tableware, clothes, shoes, bras and panties had all been stolen. So much, I had nothing to wear to work the next day. That night I received a call, it was him and one of the women he was sleeping with. They wanted me to know that they’d taken all of my belongings and I would never see them again. With her on the phone he said, “now you’ll never look good for another man.”
I paused for a minute, then said, “Clothes are sold every day. I’ll be just fine.” I then asked the woman, “What kind of man convinces you to get on the phone to call his wife because he’s angry about the divorce? How did he talk you into stealing another woman’s underwear?” She said, “He loves me, and your loss is my gain.” She would later marry him.
I reported the issue to the police and my attorney. The judge was so angry, he issued an order demanding the return of my belongings. They never did, but my attorney gave the judge the set of keys they dropped in my home during the robbery. He would later tell me this was just the beginning. He said he would do everything to make me pay for leaving him. This was a promise he would keep.
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